Are you really making your own decisions?
Most people like to think that they are free to make their own decisions and they are in full control of how their life works and have full control over any choice they make… but are you really?
Ask yourself this, when you make these “independent choices”, do you think about what your friends or family will think or abut what they will say to you? Are you worried that they might disagree or feel your choices are naive or strange? Do you go out and excessively socialise in order to fit in, even though down deep down you would rather be chasing a fitness or career related goal that may require an element of brief sacrifice so you can achieve them?
Most people have an embedded “fear of missing out”.
- “If I don’t go to the party I might miss what happens”
- “If I don’t go to their house to catch up with the group, I wont know what they have said”
- “If I skip going for drinks I might miss out on anything new that I need to know”
This then leads to an inner sense of anxiousness that people will talk about you or view you differently because you are going against what the “norm” is seen to be. These thoughts have a huge impact on peoples decision making process, Which begs the question – do you genuinely make your own choices?
We see it when it comes to nutrition – eating out, getting take away, eating foods you may not necessarily have chose if you were alone, all causing you to slip off your plan and lose track of your goals just in order to fit in with the people around you.
When it comes to training – not getting up early to train because its deemed strange or madness, going to a social event that will have you out late causing you to miss training the next morning even though you didn’t want to go, not going out for a walk to increase activity because getting your steps in is deemed weird. These are all things that play on peoples minds.
In business – not making a career move that may go along way to improving your happiness because your afraid of what people may think. Or not valuing what you do and charging accordingly because of what others will think.
Fear and anxiety – the two elements that control peoples lives and decisions much more then they realise.
Sometimes being selfish and doing what you want to do is what is needed. If you are happy and fulfilled because you are doing what you wish to do then you are in a much better position to help and bring value to others such as family and close ones. If you are unhappy and are only operating at 30-50% of your potential, are you then not doing them an injustice? Even if you think your doing them a deed putting them first?
Some thoughts to think about starting 2018 – a new year to take charge of your life.